Peace In The Promise

Have you ever been in a situation where you have heard or seen something that wasn’t quite right and felt that you should speak up or intervene in some way, but instead, you find yourself shrinking back and perhaps even conforming to those around you – even when everything within you is telling you to act?

I certainly have.

I often walk away from such situations asking myself “Why didn’t I speak up?” Or “What could I have done to help?” (Can anyone else relate? 😅😂 I literally analyse and reflect on everything, often asking God, “How could I have handled this situation better?” God is continuously teaching me how to learn from errors rather than to beat myself up about them, I discuss this briefly in “Who Do You Say That You Are“).

Such situations could be something as ‘simple’ as a friend slandering or gossiping about someone else, or a life threatening situation in which someone needs urgent help.

I have found that in such situations, many of us are hindered by fear and tend to stand by the belief that it is easier and/or safer to conform to the majority (perhaps it’s a learned method of survival), causing many to not speak out. I sincerely commend and admire those that choose to step out of the crowd with courage and boldness to stand up for what is right and true (I am sure that more often than not they are just as petrified as everyone else! They just did not allow that fear to hinder them from standing up). I seek to walk in such boldness in my own life.

Upon reflecting about this topic, 2 specific occasions came to my mind, both having slightly different outcomes:

The first scenario occurred several years ago when I was having lunch with my family at a local burger joint. Whilst awaiting our meals, I noticed a disheveled looking man staggering about on the street ahead of us. He looked in bad shape and I had a strong pull on my heart to get up and help this man. I mentioned this to my family and eventually began to approach the man cautiously with my sister. I remember my heart racing, as I had no idea what I would do when I got to him. As we got closer, it was clear that this man was afflicted with something, whether mental, emotional or substance based. Many bypassed him, and as we reached within a few meters of him a passerby called out to him, “Are you alright?”, and the man snapped in an almost incomprehensible manner “I’m fine…I’m alright!”, though his physical presentation made it clear that he was not in a good way. Nonetheless, my sister and I turned to each other in hesitation, silently said to one another with our eyes “Well…he said he’s fine…”, decided to take his word for it, and returned back to our family.

My family began to eat, but I had a deep sense of unrest within me. I felt at war in my spirit, and I felt the Holy Spirit almost grieving and weeping within me for the man; I felt so selfish for sitting and watching him without doing anything. Very soon tears began to well up in my eyes, and I remember my family, slightly puzzled (“Like, why you crying, girl??” 😂), trying to reassure me, saying: “You did what you could, you tried to approach him”, but I still did not feel as though I had done enough. Eventually, I witnessed the man collapse and knock his head. I gasped. He was now bleeding from his head. I felt so helpless, I was disgusted with the idea of enjoying my meal whilst this man suffered, and I was ashamed that I was being so crippled by fear. I couldn’t help but think: What if it were me in his place?

Soon after this, a small car pulled over and a man and a woman jumped out. They immediately rushed to his aid and called an ambulance. Of course! Why didn’t I think of that? I thought. I think I had tried to convinced myself that the situation wasn’t that big of a deal, therefore I would be ‘exaggerating’ if I called 000 (how often do we do this? 🤔 I have since learned that it is better to be safe and call for help, even for something that is seemingly “small”). The man and woman remained with him until the ambulance came, then the ambulance crew took over. Thank God.

I had a deep sense of relief when I saw the man receiving aid, but I couldn’t stop asking God and myself: Why didn’t I do more? I have since learned (through some life experiences and working in the mental health sector) that I cannot singlehandedly ‘save the whole world’ (Jesus already did that, and just by believing and declaring that he is Lord and that he died & rose for our sins, we are saved 🤩🤙🏾). I am still, however, passionate about doing my part. I didn’t want to be in that position again, and I decided personally from that moment that I did not want my excuse for not helping someone in need, that I am within reach of helping, to purely be self preservation.

The second incident occurred when my mother, sister and I were at the shops. I think it may have been around Christmas time, as the shopping center was buzzing with people! Amidst the crowd, I remember passing by a lady and a man that seemed to be having a heated interaction. The man looked very disturbed, was visibly aggrivated, and was verbally abusing the woman. I don’t even remember stopping and staring but later my sister mentioned that they hadn’t noticed what was going on until they looked back and saw me staring at the man and woman. Shortly after I had stopped, I witnessed something that will forever shock, sadden and disgust me. The man was threatening the woman, and was pushing his head mennacingly and violently into hers, head-butting her.

What saddened me more was looking around at the masses of people that continued to walk on by as this was occuring before their faces (myself included). Men, women, families and more. In a split second, I remember rushing towards her – I truly believe that the Holy Spirit took over my body in that moment, overriding any fear that tried to hinder me from helping. I believe that God wanted to speak to the heart of that woman. In this moment there was no time to entertain my thoughts and fears of “What will I say? What will I do? What if the man starts attacking me too?” I just had the faith that God would protect me, and even if the man tried to attack me, I was confident in the Lord that I would not be harmed (my sister and I had been gyming regularly during that time so I was ready to exercise my skills 😂🤺🥊 I would have gone down fighting I tell you! I was hoping my sister would back me up 😂) – I remember reaching out my hand as the woman set off to follow the man who was abusing her. I touched her back gently saying “Excuse me” and she turned. As I looked into her face my heart broke. I saw how broken she was, and my heart broke further as I couldnt imagine how she must have been feeling having been publically attacked, and for the majority of the public to not say a word or offer a helping hand. Does she know how valuable she is? Does she know that she is loved? There was so much that I wanted to say to her, but almost no time to say it, I remember looking her in the eyes (though she avoided eye contact) and asking her “Are you okay?”, the question came with such weight and concern, I knew it was the Lord speaking, not me. And I knew that he was asking her so much more. She laughed nervously saying “yeah…” shrugging as if to brush off what had just happened, like it was just a normal and regular occurrence. She then walked away from me, going after the man, and again, my heart ached. My heart ached in such a way that I knew the Holy Spirit was grieving. I continued to watch as the woman awkwardly walked after the man with a heaviness in my heart. Again, a sense of helplessness came over me, as I was frustrated with the injustice and my limitations, wishing that I could have done more, and dragged her away from the man; but this time, I also experienced a sense of peace, as I sincerely believe God reached her in a way that I couldn’t have, and that a righteous seed was planted. My prayer was for our small interaction to have a lasting impression on that woman. My prayer was that God would continue to water the seed he had planted in her in that moment, that she would have a realisation of her value and worth in the eyes of God. I prayed that she would see the love and concern in my eyes, and hear the sincerity of my tone.

I remember a man standing nearby calling out, “So, is anybody going to do something about that?”, and, if I am quite honest, I felt angry with the man. I thought, what of you? What are you doing other than talking? Where were you when it was happening? (Just keeping it real 😂) I was angry with him until I remembered the first experience (before I crucify him, let me check my own life 😂). I was reminded that, though many of us may have a desire to help, so many of us don’t know where to start, often looking for someone else to do something before we do.

We often go through the worst case scenarios in our minds (again, for survival): “What if I’m attacked? What if I get hurt in the process? What if they are dangerous? What if I get embarrassed?” Etc.

All of which may be understandable, wise, and perhaps even accurate analyses; but I can’t help but think back to the story of the Good Samaritan, and how the first 2 “Godly” men (a Priest and a Temple assistant) passed an injured man by, and even crossed the road so as to not cross paths with him. And then a Samaritan man went out of his way and was willingly inconvenienced for the sake of helping the injured man.

It is wise, especially as young women, to use wisdom in such circumstances, but I believe it unwise to think that this should mean that we can’t help at all.

Hear me out: sometimes we think that the only way of “helping” is to run into a brawl full of grown men with knives as a 5’3, regular built, no martial arts training female and to start throwing the men off each other (well hey, if you can do it, all power to you, sis! 💪🏾🤷🏾‍♀️). But I think it’s important to understand that there is more than one way! For starters, even calling the emergency services from a safe distance is helpful!

I dont want us to disregard ourselves from helping others, because of gender or size, or anything else for that matter. Helping others is a responsibility that all children of God have been given. Do not think that you have to be big and muscley in order to make a difference, or in order to help. You have your strengths, and where as someone else may be able to physically defend, perhaps your role is a comforter, a soother, a medic, a negotiator, an alarm ringer, an administrator, a peace keeper, an adviser, an encourager, a cleaner etc.

We cannot afford to belittle ourselves, as we all have a role to play! I have heard all too often the statement that we need to protect ourselves, and whereas I understand it and agree for the most part, I can’t help but think that what if that was me in such a situation where I required help, and everyone passed me by due to fear? I made a choice that day to try my best to not pass someone by that needed help.

Whether it is sounding an alarm, simply asking if someone is alright, or giving a comforting smile, I endeavour to stretch myself to assist, and reflect Christ and the heart of the Good Samaritan in this life. I have definitely fallen short, and probably will continue to do so, but I think having an awareness that we can always do something, be it big or small, can be the push that we need in order to step up and help.

So whether it is us speaking up when someone is gossiping about someone, or calling the police or the emergency services (000 in Australia) when something doesn’t seem right, I pray we can all find the courage to do our part!

For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline. (2 Timothy 1:7)

Hopefully I have communicated this clearly enough for you understand that I am not advocating for us to start blindly running into burning buildings or dangerous situations (😂🙅🏾‍♀️), but I am however encouraging us to be led by God in how we can help one another. If someone is within our reach to help, I pray may we not pass them by. Imagine how wonderful it would be if we all did our part?

As mentioned, I am still a work in progress in this area, but I have recognised that the more I practice helping/speaking up, the easier it becomes to overcome the fear associated with it (note: this does not necessarily mean that I don’t feel any fear at all).

So today, I petition us all to be led by the Holy Spirit, and that when we are stirred up to help/speak up/intervene, I challenge us to 1) use wisdom, and 2) trust that God will help us.

Perhaps he plans to use such opportunities to reveal his love and light to someone through you 🤷🏾‍♀️😉

Happy helping!

Peace!